Hey everyone! This may be a little controversial but I’m saying it anyways.
I watched a video a little while ago and ever since I’ve been thinking about it, pondering about it for a while. Then I came to realize that it’s actually true, from my point of view.
What we know about the sexual instinct isn’t what we really think it is. It’s not about intensity, chemistry, bonding, one-to-one relations. Everything that we read, told, heard, watched about the sexual subtype is all largely related to the social instinct. The sexual subtype is about Passion, Desires, Conviction, Beauty, Attraction, Emotionality. What’s fun and exciting.
You see the social subtype isn’t really about groups, or crowds, or community. The social subtype is focused on their own relationships rather than the community. Let me explain. The social instinct is focused on their community or the world to be exact in the sense that they understand how humans interact, how everyone is connected, intertwined. What’s expected of us, what we should do to make someone feel better, how to be a friend. How to be their for our loved ones. Social is about connecting with someone and finding the line that makes them feel as if their one with that person their talking with. Finding that one-to-one intensity that makes them feel connected. Even social lasts. Their trying to maintain their harmonious relationships. Their relational, wanting to be that best friend that everyone wants. Their loving, warm, caring. They probably ask themselves questions like
-Who am I? -Is this person problematic? -Are they using appropriate terminology when describing identities? -Am I offending anyone? -Should I post this photo? Is this the right thing to wear? -How should I say this? -How do our political views differ? -What makes me, me? -How do people see me right now? -Who’s in charge here?
And that’s just the start.
Sexual subtype…. I cannot express this enough. It’s not about one-to-one intimate relationships. It’s not about their chemistry, intensity, bonding or whatever else we’re saying. Theirs a reason why Sexual doms are considered rare. 3% of the worlds population are Sexual doms. Is this statistic right? Course not we won’t know exactly or what the exact percentage is but that’s what the creator had said.
I’ll try my best to explain the best I can. The Sexual subtype is highly self focused. Let me explain. Social subtype is focused on their interpersonal relationships. They focus on trying to maintain harmony. Self-preservation types are focused on their well being. Trying to maintain stability, around them and their environment. Sexual subtype is focused on what attracts them, what brings that electric fire that energizes them, what their passions are, what they desire, what psychologically arouses them. Sexual subtypes are trying to maintain their sense of identity.
Therefore sexual subtype is about psychological stimulation on what brings them the most attraction. What makes them feel good, attractive, alive, happy. Which is part of attraction/repulsion. People that have the Sexual subtype as a dominant or secondary type will be drawn towards things that spark up their attraction. I.e, tv shows, articles of clothing, a person, a store. Whatever they’re attracted to. They’ll be drawn to it until they get bored. Same goes with repulsion but it’s the opposite. Whatever they’re repulsed by. They won’t be drawn to it.
They’re described as intense, that they have this intensity about them. That is true but it’s not about the intensity between them and another person. No. Their intensity comes from their passion, their emotional intensity about their favourite topics. Whether that be fashion, humanity, animals. Photography. When engaged in a conversation that involves their passion. They’ll get this fiery emotional intensity about them that you won’t see about something that they don’t feel as connected to. This is because they don’t have this emotional connection to some other topic they’re involved in.
Due to the intense belief in their passions. This competitive nature comes into play here. Again it’s towards this psychological stimulation that drives this sort of competitive behaviour. It’s about this fun, electrifying feeling that they have inside. It’s not about who’s better, or let’s see if I can out beat you. It’s solely for having a fun time. There may be this idea if they may be able to win, not entirely sure.
Things that they may ask themselves
-Am I attractive enough
-How can I push this interaction to become more vulnerable and risky for them, and for me? How can I pull them under the surface with me?
-Am I into myself? Am I steeping in the carnal juice of selfhood in every moment? Does my bein iterate upon itself in eternal self-desire?
-If i would buy this… Would it make me look more desirable?
You may be confused by these questions. I too was confused at first but the more I thought about it the more it made sense. As much as Sexual doms are about having fun, psychological stimulation. They’re also about making themselves feel attractive in a way that makes them feel pleased, and attractive in their own eye. It could be in a way that’s pleasing to them. In their own flavour and or taste if they have Self-pres second or pleasing to themselves as well as to others if they have social second. They tend to always be dressed up when they leave the house, they may appear “sensual” and “pleasing” only in the face of a romantic interest. Let me repeat that again. “Sensual” and “Pleasing” in the face of a romantic interest because their attracted to that particular individual that they are attracted to. They want them, so they try their best to draw them in to their world of beauty.
In conclusion. The sexual instinct is not about chemistry between you and someone else, intensity or connection. It’s about how we feel about something that we are interested in. How does something make me feel. Am I satisfied and happy? Or am I repulsed by it and want nothing to do with it.
Everything we know about this instinct is confused with the social subtype. Social instinct is about their own interpersonal relationships that has to do with their chemistry between their friends, family and strangers. How are they connecting with them. Are they creating a strong bond. The core of the Sexual instinct is about attraction/repulsion, am I drawn to this object or disgusted by it? Passion and desire. Do I feel emotionally attached to these specific topics. Am I confident in my ideas. Conviction. Am I able to follow through with them until I achieve my goal etc.
This is overall true. I think people overly fixate on the idea of romantic and sexual attraction and apply it to sexual, ignoring that the bonding aspects of romance and sex are entirely social-related, and then create the idea that interpersonal relations are the sexual instinct when they’re not. Desire and repulsion is an important part of the sexual instinct. This desire-repulsion is what creates the intensity of sx relationships, and that doesn’t make it more loving than social or sp relationships (though those with sx may feel unloved if that intensity isn’t mirrored). Boundary pushing is also referenced for the sexual instinct and furthers that intense energy that’s too chaotic for many people, especially sx-blinds. Sexual can definitely be about relationships but it’s not about bonding and caring like social is. It’s more about the passion and “what can I get out of this?” But rather than practical matters like with SP, it’s about the excitement of it. Sx relationships can be intensely loving, but that loving isn’t part of the sexual instinct, just the intensity is.
So/sx in particular can end up being a mischievous type as a result of the secondary sx. That’s just an observation I’ve had.
I think also this misrepresentation may come from the fact that people don’t understand they use all instincts and the blindspot is simply the one you don’t prioritize. They think intense love = sexual but it’s actually sexual intensity utilizing the social aspect of love. People want love and connection, they wrongly chalk it up to sx, then mistype as sx dom despite definitely not being that. It’s like the issue with everyone mistyping as 4s and now 4s are horribly misrepresented because everyone is parroting wrong information.
However, I do believe sexual also has an inherent link to sexuality, hence the name. This furthers the mix up when people utilize the sexuality aspect of sexual and think they’re using sexual. No, you’re just seeking a relationship like most people do. Lack of interest in a relationship is more social blind than sx blind, but discomfort or confusion regarding sx matters is more sx blind.
Sx/sp specifically is the type most prone to that desire-repulsion imo. Since social blindness creates a lower interest in relationships, they have no interest until someone pulls them in and they become obsessed. But this seems to have become the sx stereotype for some reason.
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