Category: Enneagram Theory

Enneagram Subtypes

Posted on by DrToni

Each of the 9 main enneagram types also has three subtypes which mean there are actually 27 enneagram subtypes! This gives much more understanding to a person’s type and provides more potential for growth!

What is an Enneagram Subtype?
An enneagram subtype (also known as an instinctual subtype or instinctual variant) is a combination of your main enneagram type (one of the nine numbers) and your survival instinct (there are three options).

Main enneagram type + survival instinct = subtype.

Of course, we no longer need to depend on our survival instinct quite as strongly as our ancestors did, but we still have a survival drive and then are seen in three forms or options.

No matter what type you are, you are wired towards one of these survival instincts. We’ll get into what that looks like for all the 27 possibilities below!

What are the Three Survival Instincts
The three survival instincts or what we call “subtypes” are Self-Preservation, Social, and Sexual (better called Intimate or One-to-One).

Self-Preservation (SP):
This instinctual subtype gives priority to physical needs such as health, finances, food, shelter, and family.

Social (SO):
This instinctual subtype gives priority to belonging and being accepted by the group or community.

Sexual/Intimate/One-to-One (SX):
This instinctual subtype gives priority to connecting intimately with individuals. Having “chemistry” with others but this does not necessarily need to be sexual (hence why “sexual” is not the best name for this subtype)

Instinctual Subtype Stacking 1

Can You Have More than One Subtype/Survival Instinct?
Yes, well somewhat. Everyone as one dominant instinctual subtype but that does not mean that they do not have access to the other two options.

This is what is called Instinctual Subtype Stacking (sometimes called sequencing)

We have access to all three survival instincts but they are on different levels or priorities.

These three levels/priorities are dominant, secondary, and tertiary.

Dominant = Over aware
Secondary = Neutral
Tertiary = Underdeveloped, a blindspot.

This is why you often see people list their subtype stacking instead of just one subtype.

Example: I’m a SO/SP 1. Social is my dominant subtype and self-preservation is my neutral secondary subtype, and I don’t need to list sexual/intimate (SX) because it’s obviously my last stacking and thus my blind spot.

There can be a bit of shifting between instinctual subtypes depending on your circumstances in life. For instance, your neutral subtype might kick in during a particularly hard time. However, generally, your stacking stays the same although the goal is to bring all three instincts into balance.

Does My Subtype Change My Enneagram Type?
No. Your subtype shifts how your main enneagram type acts but you are still 100% your type.

The way you act to survive causes you to look a bit different than others of your enneagram type with a different subtype but you will have the same core motivation as others with the same enneagram type.

In other words, if you are a social 9, you will appear a bit different than a self-preservation 9 or sexual 9…but you will still all share the same core motivation, you just go about getting that core desire a bit differently.

Enneagram Countertypes
The subtypes have a connection to the enneagram vices (or “deadly sins”). Most of the types use their vice in a typical way but one of our three instincts/subtypes uses it in the opposite way.

Example: A type 1’s vice is anger (better known as resentment for 1s). Self-Preservation and Social 1s tend to suppress their anger but the Sexual 1 is actually a bit ok with expressing their anger.

Subtypes who use their vice in a non-stereotypical way are the countertypes. They are still 100% their main type because they have the same core motivation but they often look more like a different type due to their actions and traits.

The 27 Enneagram Subtypes
subtype 1Type 1 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 1s
Focuses On: The need to be correct/right with their families, their health, their finances, and their homes.

SP 1s are the more stereotypical perfectionists of the 1s and are more likely to deal with worry and anxiety (over being correct/right) than other type 1s. However, they are also often the more warm and friendly of the 1 subtypes.

Relationship to Their Vice (anger): SP 1s tend to suppress their anger (and they tend to suppress it the most out of the 1 subtypes)

Potential Mistypes: SP 1s can often look like type 6s.

Social 1s
Focuses On: The need to be correct/right with their groups and communities.

SO 1s often take on being the teacher or role model with those around them; trying to show others the right way to live. These 1s are often concerned with fairness and justice.

Relationship to Their Vice (anger): SO 1s often suppress their anger but are also a bit ok with showing it.

Potential Mistypes: SO 1s can often look like type 3s or type 5s.

Sexual/Intimate 1s
Focuses On: The need to be correct/right with their intimate connections.

SX 1s are the Countertype of type 1 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (anger). They focus less on perfecting themselves and instead use their energy and zeal on perfecting others.

Relationship to Their Vice (anger): SX 1s are more likely to show anger than suppress it like the other 1 subtypes.

Potential Mistypes: SX 1s can often look like type 8s.

Type 2 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 2s
Focuses On: The need to be charming in order to have their physical needs met.

SP 2s are the Countertype of type 2 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (pride). They are timider in connecting with others; less prone to being helpers/givers. They tend to appear childish or childlike in order to be taken care of.

Relationship to Their Vice (pride): SP 2s tend to suppress their pride (and they tend to suppress it the most out of the 2 subtypes)

Potential Mistypes: SP 2s can often look like type 4s, type 6s, or type 7s.

Social 2s
Focuses On: The need to be charming with their groups and communities.

SO 2s focus on charming groups and communities and being influential within these groups. They tend to be generous and offer support, advice, and help in order to be seen as needed by the group.

Relationship to Their Vice (pride): SO 2s are more likely to show pride than the other subtypes of 2.

Potential Mistypes: SO 2s can often look like type 3s or type 8s.

Sexual/Intimate 2s
Focuses On: The need to be charming with their intimate connections.

SX 2s focus on charming and attracting strong intimate relationships. They are a bit more passionate and emotional than the other type 2s and often try to be physically appealing to others.

Relationship to Their Vice (pride): SX 2s may show pride.

Potential Mistypes: SX 2s can often look like type 4s.

Type 3 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 3s
Focuses On: The need to be valuable/admired in order to have their physical needs met.

SP 3s are the Countertype of type 3 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (vanity). They want to achieve but they don’t want to brag about it. These 3’s focus more on being good and attaining material security for themselves and their family.

Relationship to Their Vice (vanity): SP 3s tend to suppress their vanity

Potential Mistypes: SP 3s can often look like type 1s.

Social 3s
Focuses On: The need to be valuable/admired in their groups and communities.

SO 3s are more of the stereotypical 3 who want to climb the social ladder and be in the spotlight. They can be highly competitive in order to be or appear successful in whatever they are doing.

Relationship to Their Vice (vanity): SO 3s are more likely to show vanity than the other subtypes of 3.

Potential Mistypes: SO 3s can often look like type 8s.

Sexual/Intimate 3s
Focuses On: The need to be valuable/admired by their intimate connections.

SX 3s focus on being attractive and supportive with their intimate relationships. They tend to measure their value by how useful they are to those around them. These 3s are charismatic and love promoting others.

Relationship to Their Vice (vanity): SX 3s may show vanity.

Potential Mistypes: SX 3s can often look like type 2s.

Type 4 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 4s
Focuses On: The need to be themselves in order to have their physical needs met.

SP 4s are the Countertype of type 4 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (envy). They work to get what they feel others have/that they lack (not generally material envy but a more characteristic/wholeness envy). Nicknamed the “happy 4” they tend to keep the sad/hard emotions for behind closed doors.

Relationship to Their Vice (envy): SP 4s tend to suppress their envy.

Potential Mistypes: SP 4s can often look like type 1s, 3s, or 7s.

Social 4s
Focuses On: The need to be themselves with their groups and communities.

SO 4s are more of the stereotypical 4 who is open with all of their feelings and feels more shame than the other 4s. They connect to themselves and others through their authentic feelings.

Relationship to Their Vice (envy): SO 4s are more likely to show envy than the other subtypes of 4.

Potential Mistypes: SO 4s can often look like type 6s.

Sexual/Intimate 4s
Focuses On: The need to be themselves with their intimate connections.

SX 4s are nicknamed the “angry 4” as they are not afraid to ask for or demand for what they need. They are more shameless than shameful and can be competitive to avoid feeling “less than”.

Relationship to Their Vice (vanity): SX 4s may show envy.

Potential Mistypes: SX 4s can often look like type 3s or type 8s.

Type 5 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 5s
Focuses On: The need to be competent with their families, health, finances, and home.

SP 5s are the more stereotypical of the 5s and are more focused on maintaining strong boundaries so that they don’t become invaded. They try to limit their needs in order to avoid being dependent on others.

Relationship to Their Vice (avarice): SP 5s are ore likely to show avarice than other subtypes.
*Note: Avarice in the sense of feeling the need to carefully guard what they have; not a greed-based avarice.

Potential Mistypes: SP 5s are unlikely to mistype.

Social 5s
Focuses On: The need to be competent with their groups and communities.

SO 5s are the most extroverted of the 5s. They focus on gaining knowledge and potentially sharing that knowledge within their groups and communities. Their avarice is connected more to knowledge than to things.

Relationship to Their Vice (avarice): SO 5s may show avarice.
*Note Avarice in the sense of feeling the need to carefully guard what they have; not a greed-based avarice.

Potential Mistypes: SO 5s can often look like type 1s.

Sexual/Intimate 5s
Focuses On: The need to be competent with their intimate connections.

SX 5s are the Countertype of type 5 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (avarice). They focus on finding select individuals to trust and share life with. They are more aware of their feelings internally but may not show them.

Relationship to Their Vice (avarice): SX 5s are unlikely to show vanity.
*Note Avarice in the sense of feeling the need to carefully guard what they have; not a greed-based avarice.

Potential Mistypes: SX 5s can often look like type 4s.

Type 6 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 6s
Focuses On: The need to be secure/supported within their families, health, finances, and home.

SP 6s are the more stereotypical and most phobic of the 6s. They focus on being warm and building connections that will become their trusted alliances which will help them feel more secure and supported.

Relationship to Their Vice (fear): SP 6s are the most likely to show fear than the other subtypes of 6.

Potential Mistypes: SP 6s can often look like type 2s.

Social 6s
Focuses On: The need to be secure/supported with their groups and communities.

SO 6s focus on being responsible and logical to feel secure and supported. These 6s handle their fear by following authorities and rules. They love accuracy and knowing what is expected of them. Structure and guidelines bring security to these 6s.

Relationship to Their Vice (fear): SO 6s may show fear.

Potential Mistypes: SO 6s can often look like type 1s.

Sexual/Intimate 6s
Focuses On: The need to be secure/supported with their intimate connections.

SX 6s are the Countertype of type 6 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (fear), this is the subtype that is usually referred to as a “counterphobic 6” They may even be unaware of their fear as they tend to take on a “the best defense is a good offense” mentality.

Relationship to Their Vice (fear): SX 6s tend to suppress fear.

Potential Mistypes: SX 6s can often look like type 8s.

Type 7 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 7s
Focuses On: The need to be satisfied in their families, health, finances, and home.

SP 7s are the more stereotypical of the 7s. They focus on pragmatic planning and networking in order to support their own needs. They work towards satisfaction by being fun and building a network of supporters.

Relationship to Their Vice (gluttony): SP 7s are more likely to show gluttony than the other subtypes of 7.
Note: Gluttony does not need to be strictly related to food.

Potential Mistypes: SP 7s are unlikely to mistype.

Social 7s
Focuses On: The need to be satisfied with their groups and communities.

SO 7s are the Countertype of type 7 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (gluttony). These 7s have a more “give to get” mentality. They are willing to sacrifice their desires for the group and use enthusiasm to make themselves valued in the group.

Relationship to Their Vice (gluttony): SO 7s are not likely to show gluttony.
Note: Gluttony does not need to be strictly related to food.

Potential Mistypes: SO 7s can often look like type 2s.

Sexual/Intimate 7s
Focuses On: The need to be satisfied with their intimate connections.

SX 7s see the world through rose-colored glasses. They focus on exciting possibilities and idealistic dreams. They can lean more towards naive but they also can charm others into new visions and adventures.

Relationship to Their Vice (gluttony): SX 7s may show gluttony.
Note: Gluttony does not need to be strictly related to food.

Potential Mistypes: SX 7s can often look like type 4s.

Type 8 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 8s
Focuses On: The need to be protective of their families, health, finances, and home.

SP 8s focus on meeting their desire to be protective and autonomous by gaining power and influence. They get what they need quickly with no nonsense. These 8s are more direct and less emotional than other 8s.

Relationship to Their Vice (lust): SP 8s are likely to show lust.
Note: Lust does not need to be strictly sexual.

Potential Mistypes: SP 8s can sometimes look like type 5s.

Social 8s
Focuses On: The need to be protective of their groups and communities.

SO 8s are the Countertype of type 8 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (lust). These 8s focus on using their power and influence to serve and protect those in their group. They are very aware of injustice and less aggressive than other 8s.

Relationship to Their Vice (lust): SO 8s are not likely to show lust.
Note: Lust does not need to be strictly sexual.

Potential Mistypes: SO 8s can often look like type 2s.

Sexual/Intimate 8s
Focuses On: The need to be protective of their intimate connections.

SX 8s have a strong rebellious nature and like to command the attention of everyone. They focus on having possession of the environment around them. These 8s are the ore provocative and have a stronger desire for intensity than the other 8s.

Relationship to Their Vice (lust): SX 8s may show lust.
Note: Lust does not need to be strictly sexual.

Potential Mistypes: SX 8s can often look like type 4s.

Type 9 Subtypes
Self-Preservation 9s
Focuses On: The need to be at peace with their families, health, finances, and home.

SP 9s are more of the stereotypical 9 and they focus on living comfortably. They find peace in routines and familiar activities. They can be more aggressively concerned with meeting their physical needs than other 9s would.

Relationship to Their Vice (sloth): SP 9s are likely to show sloth.
Note: Sloth refers to slowness to do harder internal work such as engaging with their desires and needs.

Potential Mistypes: SP 9s can sometimes look like type 5s or type 8s.

Social 9s
Focuses On: The need to be at peace with their groups and communities.

SO 9s are the Countertype of type 9 as they react in an opposite way with their vice (sloth). These fun-loving 9s can become workaholics as they put the needs of the group above their own.

Relationship to Their Vice (sloth): SO 9s suppress sloth.
Note: Sloth refers to a slowness to do harder internal work such as engaging with their desires and needs.

Potential Mistypes: SO 9s can often look like type 3s or type 7s.

Sexual/Intimate 9s
Focuses On: The need to be at peace with their intimate connections.

SX 9s are very relationship-oriented and tend to merge with the opinions, attitudes, and passions of their intimate connections. These 9s are the more gentle and non-assertive of the 9s.

Relationship to Their Vice (sloth): SX 9s may show sloth.
Note: Sloth refers to slowness to do harder internal work such as engaging with their desires and needs.

Potential Mistypes: SX 9s can often look like type 2s or type 4s.

Want More Information on Subtypes?
If you want to learn more about the subtypes, I highly recommend picking up Beatrice Chestnut’s book: The Complete Enneagram. It focuses on and explains the 27 subtypes in great detail.

 

 

Enneagram Types Under Stress

Posted on by DrToni

Find out the root stressors of each #enneatype, and how to help someone who is stressed based on their enneatype. #Enneagram, #Personality

How Every Enneagram Type Reacts to Stress, and How to Help

BySusan Storm
 ·  ·  ·  ·  ·  ·  ·  ·  · 

Have you ever become so stressed that you “flipped a switch” and acted like someone else? Maybe it felt like an out-of-body experience or you felt completely beyond your own control? Well, according to the enneagram system, there’s a reason for that! Each type has an area of disintegration (stress) that they veer into when they become especially stressed, but before that time happens, there’s also a sequence of unhealthy behaviors or feelings that may occur. That’s what we’re going to explore today!

How Every Enneagram Type Reacts to Stress, and How to Help

Enneagram 1 in Stress

What stresses out the One Enneatype?

  • Being around lazy or undependable people.
  • Not seeing action taken towards a goal.
  • Shame over mistakes they’ve made.
  • Not living up to their own expectations.
  • Others not living up to their expectations.
  • Feeling like they have to be the responsible one while others are slacking.
  • Being taken for granted
  • Corruption in the world
  • Hypocrisy
  • Apathy
  • People being late
  • Messy surroundings
  • Their Own Perfectionism

Normally grounded and pragmatic, Ones under stress suddenly become moody and withdrawn. They’re often burned out by trying to live up by their ever-increasing expectations, and this exhaustion leads to resentment and anger. However, because Ones are always trying to repress their anger, it leaks out into irritated comments, sarcastic jabs, or cynical jokes. If stress is extreme, Ones lose their usual self-discipline and become more hostile, withdrawn, and emotionally reactive. They might overeat, break some of their own rules, or throw caution to the wind. It’s as if they’ve fired their “inner critic” and, for a moment, are letting loose a rebel that was always hiding in the corner. They become more self-indulgent, self-conscious, and dramatic.

How to Help a One Experiencing Stress:

  • Let them have an outburst. Just be with them. Don’t judge.
  • Take on some of the responsibilities around them without having to be asked.
  • Acknowledge the hard work they’ve put forth on a goal.
  • Thank them for the things they’ve done for you.
  • Give them some time alone to decompress.
  • Realize that they might be especially moody and critical. Try to be patient.
  • Let them know that they aren’t responsible for everything. Give them a break from some of their responsibilities.
  • Clean up the house or the area they’re in. Give them a sense that things are in order.
  • Remind them that nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes if they’re being self-critical.
  • After they’ve had a chance to calm down, give them something safe to play at. Watch a comedy with them, get them outside, or make them laugh.

Enneagram 2 in Stress

 What Stresses Out the Two Enneatype?

  • Being taken for granted
  • Too much time alone
  • Feeling unloved for who they are
  • Saying “yes” to too many things and burning themselves out
  • Not getting affirmation or gratitude for their kind deeds
  • Feeling left out
  • Being around emotionally distant people
  • Not having their kindness reciprocated
  • Not feeling needed

The core desire of the two is to feel loved for who they truly are. These types need to nurture themselves as much as they nurture others, but often they overextend themselves on others’ behalf. They hope that through selfless pursuits they will earn a sense of worth and love. When these types are severely stressed they become more blunt and aggressive. Usually kind-hearted and gentle, they suddenly reveal a shocking inner toughness. They will confront people directly for their misdeeds and won’t hold back in arguments that they’d normally shy away from. This fiery resolve and directness is usually shocking to people who are used to their normal gregarious, empathetic demeanor. While this is happening, Twos become more concerned with their survival. They’ll work harder and become more controlling of the world around them.

How to Help a Two Experiencing Stress:

  • Show them you care and acknowledge the kind things they have done.
  • Help them set healthy boundaries so that they don’t keep overextending themselves.
  • Remind them that they don’t need to worry so much about what other people think of them. Remind them of who their loyal friends and loved ones are – and that it’s okay not to be “perfect.”
  • Realize that they might be more confrontational and aggressive than usual. Understand that this is temporary, and try not to judge too harshly unless they are endangering someone.
  • Ask them if they want to vent, write down their feelings, or listen to a particular song to find a mirror for their feelings.
  • Help them find creative modes of self-expression like drawing, singing, or writing.
  • Tell them that it’s not selfish for them to take care of themselves and spend time on their own pursuits.
  • Help them cancel some of their non-essential obligations.

Enneagram 3 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram Threes:

  • Not seeing progress towards a goal.
  • Feeling like a failure.
  • Feeling incompetent or being around incompetence.
  • Not being acknowledged for what they do.
  • Not accomplishing things.
  • Losing.
  • Comparing themselves to others who are highly successful.
  • Feeling worthless or undesirable.
  • Not being challenged.
  • Being around people who lack vision.

Highly-focused and driven to succeed, Threes often burn themselves out trying to be the best at whatever they do. Not afraid of a challenge, they enjoy proving themselves and standing out amid a crowd of mediocre individuals. However, when they are highly stressed they can push themselves way too hard and punish themselves too viciously for their failures. When extreme stress hits, they can suddenly flip a switch and become more listless and apathetic. They fill their time with busywork to try to avoid facing the reality of the problems they’re dealing with. Instead of actually doing anything, they may get caught up in fantasies of their next big success. They also may feel more hyper-sensitive than usual but will avoid facing their feelings directly. These stress episodes are confusing for them and their loved ones because they’re typically so hard-working and ambitious.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Three:

  • Let them take off their “mask” of competence and capability. Patiently let them talk about what’s bothering them or give them time alone to decompress.
  • Help them take deep breaths and tune into their body. Are they hungry? Thirsty? Tired? In pain? Help them recognize their physical needs.
  • Encourage them (non-forcefully) to talk about their feelings. Remind them that you’re there to listen, not to judge. Give them a safe space to express their vulnerabilities without judging, offering advice, or coddling them. Simply listen.
  • Be authentic about your own vulnerabilities – this will help them to feel safe being vulnerable with you.
  • Draw their attention towards a creative avenue. Creative activity often helps Threes tremendously. Give them time to write, draw, listen to music, etc,.
  • Acknowledge their successes and how they’ve helped you.
  • Try to clean any messes in their surroundings. Disordered external surroundings tend to stress them.

Enneagram 4 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 4s:

  • Having to go along with the crowd.
  • Too many external pressures.
  • Feeling misunderstood or criticized.
  • Being micro-managed.
  • Being forced to follow a lot of rules and guidelines.
  • Not making progress on their creative goals.
  • Having to put on a “happy face” when they are struggling emotionally.
  • Having their feelings dismissed.
  • Living in dull, non-personalized surroundings.
  • Feeling creatively blocked.

Imaginative and melancholy, Fours believe in being deeply authentic and finding their unique identity in the world. They hate feeling forced into a box or unable to express their true feelings and ideals. When stressed, Fours tend to isolate themselves and brood over their negative feelings. They dwell on the darkness of their emotions and allow those feelings to engulf them. If stress increases to an extreme level, they may suddenly change and become more outgoing and anxious for human interaction. They might try too hard to please others or find ways to get closer to people. They will seem more needy, expressive, and people-pleasing. They crave affirmation and are terrified of being abandoned or rejected. They will try to help others in order to regain a sense of being needed by the ones they love.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Four:

  • Allow them to express their feelings. Don’t tell them how they feel or cut them off. Understand that their feelings are unique to them.
  • Remind them of what’s real and what they can count on. Don’t minimize their feelings, but point out the reality of the situation while empathizing with them.
  • Remind them of their talents and strengths.
  • Help them set up some positive routines that will create a more peaceful atmosphere in their home.
  • Set up healthy boundaries if they are regularly using you as an emotional dumping ground.
  • Remind them of what’s positive in the present moment.
  • Offer empathy before advice.
  • Let them know that they are lovable regardless of how different they are from others.

Read This Next: 7 Struggles of the Enneagram 4 Personality Type

Enneagram 5 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 5s:

  • Not getting enough alone time.
  • Being “barged in on.”
  • Feeling incompetent or incapable.
  • Feeling too detached from the physical world.
  • Physical malnutrition and neglect.
  • Being overwhelmed by fears and dark thoughts.
  • Not finding a niche for themselves.
  • Feeling like life is meaningless.
  • Extreme isolation and lack of connection.

Fives crave mastery in something that will set them apart from others. These types often grew up feeling misunderstood and lost in their families. They worried that they weren’t capable of handling whatever life hurled at them, and hoped that through mastery in a niche area they could feel competent. However, many Fives search endlessly for mastery and knowledge, only to get lost in theoretical analysis over real-world experience. Over time, they can become reclusive, detached, and anxious. Stress builds as they sense their growing detachment from reality and their own physical bodies. During regular stress, they try to get away from the world and narrow their focus on their niche interest. As stress builds, they become increasingly distractible. They may drink too much, binge eat, go to parties, clubs, and bars in search of an escape from their stress. They may seem especially aggressive and insensitive during these moments.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Five:

  • Help them to quiet their mind. Guide them through deep breathing and help them relax their body.
  • Help them tune into their body. Are they exhausted? Dehydrated? Hungry? In pain? Fives often detach from their physical needs under stress. Help guide them back to their bodies so that they can get physical peace.
  • Get them involved in a healthy activity. Take a walk, jump on a trampoline, go to the zoo, practice martial arts. These activities can reduce stress tremendously.
  • Remind them that you’ll be there for them regardless of whatever happens. Let them know that it’s okay to tell you about their needs and that it doesn’t make them “weak.”
  • Recognize their accomplishments and unique abilities.
  • Help them put their knowledge to the test in the real world when they’re feeling less stressed. The more they actualize their abilities the happier they will become.
  • Let them feel their grief. Show that you are trustworthy. Don’t coddle them or overly sympathize. Just show that you are there for them and remind them not to swallow their feelings. Encourage them to express themselves so that they can find relief.
  • Respect their need for privacy.
  • Don’t interrupt them or barge in on them.

Enneagram 6 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram Sixes:

  • Undependable people
  • Disorder in their environment
  • Corruption or chaos in the world
  • Not trusting themselves
  • Not having a sense of community or support
  • Getting lost in catastrophizing
  • Feeling unsafe
  • Lack of structure or clarity
  • Burnout from over-committing and taking on too many responsibilities
  • Not finding answers to their questions
  • Wishy-washy behavior
  • Having other people decide for them
  • Feeling distrustful of people close to them
  • Making mistakes

Hard-working and loyal, Sixes crave an environment of security, support, and structure. They like knowing what’s going to happen and when it’s going to happen. Natural catastrophizers, they prepare for worst-case scenarios and are vigilant to any potential disaster. Under stress, Sixes become hyper-aware of all that could go wrong. They become exceedingly anxious and envision horrific possibilities at every turn. They get lost in endless thoughts and negative possibilities and may get caught up in researching solutions or news stories that might provide answers. They may also seek authority or guide to help them find the best way to handle the situation. If stress builds to extreme levels, they disintegrate to 3. When this happens, they become more image-conscious and focused on how they appear to others. They may put on a persona of professionalism and confidence, becoming boastful and self-promoting. Their work absorbs them and they become fixated on achievement. By being competitive and ambitious they hope they can assuage their low self-esteem and brutal anxiety.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Six:

  • Remind them of what’s real and dependable.
  • Ask them to assume the worst happens. Then what they will do? Letting them talk it out can help them to calm down and realistically assess the situation.
  • Remind them that the worst could happen, but that the best could happen as well.
  • Don’t patronize their fears.
  • Follow through on your commitments and promises.
  • Remind them that you’re there for them.
  • Help them tune into their body. Guide them through deep breathing.
  • Ask them to assess their physical needs. Are they hungry? Tired? Thirsty? Remind them not to forget their physical needs.
  • Exercise with them or go for a walk. This can increase stress-reducing endorphins in the brain.
  • Help them to calm the flurry of internal voices in their mind. Encourage them to listen to their heart and instincts.
  • Make sure they’re getting time alone.
  • Help them cancel non-essential responsibilities that are overwhelming them.

Enneagram 7 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 7s:

  • Being micro-managed
  • Not having enough personal freedom
  • Lack of free, unstructured time
  • Excessive responsibilities
  • Being cooped up for too long
  • Being stuck in one place for too long
  • Boredom
  • Doing nitty-gritty, detail work
  • Financial problems
  • Being stuck in a routine
  • Lack of loyal friendships

Sevens are enthusiastic and innovative, finding possibility in even the direst situations. Because they’re so creative it’s typically easy for them to reframe a negative situation into a positive one. That said, they still experience stress just like everyone does. When Sevens are stressed, they become more escapist and impulsive. They’ll fixate on finding a fun activity or experience to pursue, and may become more hedonistic or scattered than usual. If stress builds to extreme degrees, they can disintegrate to One. When this happens, they restrain their normally free-spirited behaviors. They will work harder, educate people, and become more critical and judgmental. They may even scold, nitpick, or become sarcastic with people – noticing all their flaws and the flaws of others.

How to Help a Stressed Enneagram Seven:

  • Help them to calm down and take deep breaths.
  • Guide them through observing their feelings, both physical and emotional. They may dislike this initially and need some time alone first. It’s important for them to do this, though, either alone or with someone they can trust.
  • Meditation can be very helpful for Sevens. Encourage them to stick with this, even if it seems boring.
  • Encourage them to accept pain as well as pleasure. Help them to realize that pain is an integral part of life and will help them grow.
  • Be supportive as they vent or try to deal with their grief.
  • Give them delicious, healthy snacks to enjoy.
  • Help them to find a song that mirrors their emotions and listen to it with them.

Enneagram 8 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 8s:

  • Feeling out of control
  • Being micro-managed
  • Having to be a follower
  • Having their autonomy infringed upon
  • Not seeing progress towards a goal
  • Failure
  • Wishy-washy, vapid people
  • Manipulative people
  • Having to sugarcoat things
  • Having to play it safe
  • Being around corruption
  • Not being challenged

Charismatic and strong-willed, Eights crave freedom and a sense of power in their world. They need independence, and any situation that takes that away from them can create an enormous amount of stress and anger. During stress, Eights become more confrontational than usual and can work harder, trying to achieve more independence and control in their lives. If stress builds to extreme degrees, Eights can suddenly become reclusive and withdrawn. They get stuck in analysis, reading, and info-gathering, trying to find subjects to master in an attempt to feel competent again. They may stop taking care of themselves physically and become more quiet and detached than usual.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Enneagram Eight:

  • Prove that you are someone they can trust. Follow through on your promises and mean what you say.
  • Give them some time to themselves to decompress and sort things out.
  • Help them to tune into their breathing and calm their body.
  • Remind them that it’s okay to let down their guard around you. Let them know this doesn’t make them “weak.”
  • Let them know if they are intimidating you.
  • Show them that progress is being made towards a goal.
  • Be clear and direct with them, but understanding.

Enneagram 9 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 9s:

  • Conflict in their environment
  • Being with people who are making a “scene”
  • Being forced into a position
  • Being ignored or passed over
  • Saying “yes” to things they don’t want to do
  • Dealing with peer pressure
  • Losing relationships that are important to them
  • Suppressing anger for too long
  • Having too many demands on their time

Nines crave inner harmony and peace. They want time to themselves to imagine, contemplate, and explore. They enjoy peaceful, harmonious environments and freedom. During stress, they try to downplay their own choices and needs in an effort to create inner peace as well as outer peace. They worry that by asserting themselves they will create more conflict, both inside and outside. They try to suppress their anger, fearing that it will fragment or destroy them in some way. If stress increases to extreme levels, Nines fixate on forming relationships and security. They worry about worst-case scenarios and become uncharacteristically pessimistic and paranoid. They might blame other people for their problems or bring up long-stifled complaints about others. Their normally serene nature cracks to reveal numerous anxieties and frustrations under the surface.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Nine:

  • Give them permission to assert themselves and their needs. Ask them to “let it all out” and remind them that this is a judgment-free zone.
  • Give them some space and time to themselves.
  • Remind them that it’s okay to say “No” to things they don’t want to do.
  • Recognize their unique talents and encourage them to pursue them.
  • Help them process their anger. Remind them that anger isn’t always a bad thing. Use examples if possible.
  • Help them tune into their bodies. What do they need physically? Help them to take deep breaths.
  • Go for a jog with them or engage in some other form of exercise. This will help them to de-stress and process some of their feelings.

Susan Storm is a certified MBTI® practitioner and Enneagram coach. She is the mom of five beautiful children and loves using her knowledge of personality types to understand them and others better! For fun, she enjoys reading fiction, spending time outdoors, or challenging her friends to tabletop board gaming competitions (Settlers of Catan, anyone?)

Not sure what your enneagram type is? Take our new personality questionnaire here!

Sources: The Wisdom of the Enneagram, Personality Types: Using the Enneagram for Self-Discovery. These links are affiliate links. This means that if you purchase one of these eBooks, I get a small commission to help run my site.

Table of contents

Estimated reading time: 16 minutes

How Every Enneagram Type Reacts to Stress, and How to Help

Enneagram 1 in Stress

What stresses out the One Enneatype?

  • Being around lazy or undependable people.
  • Not seeing action taken towards a goal.
  • Shame over mistakes they’ve made.
  • Not living up to their own expectations.
  • Others not living up to their expectations.
  • Feeling like they have to be the responsible one while others are slacking.
  • Being taken for granted
  • Corruption in the world
  • Hypocrisy
  • Apathy
  • People being late
  • Messy surroundings
  • Their Own Perfectionism

Normally grounded and pragmatic, Ones under stress suddenly become moody and withdrawn. They’re often burned out by trying to live up by their ever-increasing expectations, and this exhaustion leads to resentment and anger. However, because Ones are always trying to repress their anger, it leaks out into irritated comments, sarcastic jabs, or cynical jokes. If stress is extreme, Ones lose their usual self-discipline and become more hostile, withdrawn, and emotionally reactive. They might overeat, break some of their own rules, or throw caution to the wind. It’s as if they’ve fired their “inner critic” and, for a moment, are letting loose a rebel that was always hiding in the corner. They become more self-indulgent, self-conscious, and dramatic.

How to Help a One Experiencing Stress:

  • Let them have an outburst. Just be with them. Don’t judge.
  • Take on some of the responsibilities around them without having to be asked.
  • Acknowledge the hard work they’ve put forth on a goal.
  • Thank them for the things they’ve done for you.
  • Give them some time alone to decompress.
  • Realize that they might be especially moody and critical. Try to be patient.
  • Let them know that they aren’t responsible for everything. Give them a break from some of their responsibilities.
  • Clean up the house or the area they’re in. Give them a sense that things are in order.
  • Remind them that nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes if they’re being self-critical.
  • After they’ve had a chance to calm down, give them something safe to play at. Watch a comedy with them, get them outside, or make them laugh.

Enneagram 2 in Stress

 What Stresses Out the Two Enneatype?

  • Being taken for granted
  • Too much time alone
  • Feeling unloved for who they are
  • Saying “yes” to too many things and burning themselves out
  • Not getting affirmation or gratitude for their kind deeds
  • Feeling left out
  • Being around emotionally distant people
  • Not having their kindness reciprocated
  • Not feeling needed

The core desire of the two is to feel loved for who they truly are. These types need to nurture themselves as much as they nurture others, but often they overextend themselves on others’ behalf. They hope that through selfless pursuits they will earn a sense of worth and love. When these types are severely stressed they become more blunt and aggressive. Usually kind-hearted and gentle, they suddenly reveal a shocking inner toughness. They will confront people directly for their misdeeds and won’t hold back in arguments that they’d normally shy away from. This fiery resolve and directness is usually shocking to people who are used to their normal gregarious, empathetic demeanor. While this is happening, Twos become more concerned with their survival. They’ll work harder and become more controlling of the world around them.

How to Help a Two Experiencing Stress:

  • Show them you care and acknowledge the kind things they have done.
  • Help them set healthy boundaries so that they don’t keep overextending themselves.
  • Remind them that they don’t need to worry so much about what other people think of them. Remind them of who their loyal friends and loved ones are – and that it’s okay not to be “perfect.”
  • Realize that they might be more confrontational and aggressive than usual. Understand that this is temporary, and try not to judge too harshly unless they are endangering someone.
  • Ask them if they want to vent, write down their feelings, or listen to a particular song to find a mirror for their feelings.
  • Help them find creative modes of self-expression like drawing, singing, or writing.
  • Tell them that it’s not selfish for them to take care of themselves and spend time on their own pursuits.
  • Help them cancel some of their non-essential obligations.

Enneagram 3 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram Threes:

  • Not seeing progress towards a goal.
  • Feeling like a failure.
  • Feeling incompetent or being around incompetence.
  • Not being acknowledged for what they do.
  • Not accomplishing things.
  • Losing.
  • Comparing themselves to others who are highly successful.
  • Feeling worthless or undesirable.
  • Not being challenged.
  • Being around people who lack vision.

Highly-focused and driven to succeed, Threes often burn themselves out trying to be the best at whatever they do. Not afraid of a challenge, they enjoy proving themselves and standing out amid a crowd of mediocre individuals. However, when they are highly stressed they can push themselves way too hard and punish themselves too viciously for their failures. When extreme stress hits, they can suddenly flip a switch and become more listless and apathetic. They fill their time with busywork to try to avoid facing the reality of the problems they’re dealing with. Instead of actually doing anything, they may get caught up in fantasies of their next big success. They also may feel more hyper-sensitive than usual, but will avoid facing their feelings directly. These stress episodes are confusing for them and their loved ones because they’re typically so hard-working and ambitious.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Three:

  • Let them take off their “mask” of competence and capability. Patiently let them talk about what’s bothering them or give them time alone to decompress.
  • Help them take deep breaths and tune into their body. Are they hungry? Thirsty? Tired? In pain? Help them recognize their physical needs.
  • Encourage them (non-forcefully) to talk about their feelings. Remind them that you’re there to listen, not to judge. Give them a safe space to express their vulnerabilities without judging, offering advice, or coddling them. Simply listen.
  • Be authentic about your own vulnerabilities – this will help them to feel safe being vulnerable with you.
  • Draw their attention towards a creative avenue. Creative activity often helps Threes tremendously. Give them time to write, draw, listen to music, etc,.
  • Acknowledge their successes and how they’ve helped you.
  • Try to clean any messes in their surroundings. Disordered external surroundings tend to stress them.

Enneagram 4 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 4s:

  • Having to go along with the crowd.
  • Too many external pressures.
  • Feeling misunderstood or criticized.
  • Being micro-managed.
  • Being forced to follow a lot of rules and guidelines.
  • Not making progress on their creative goals.
  • Having to put on a “happy face” when they are struggling emotionally.
  • Having their feelings dismissed.
  • Living in dull, non-personalized surroundings.
  • Feeling creatively blocked.

Imaginative and melancholy, Fours believe in being deeply authentic and finding their unique identity in the world. They hate feeling forced into a box or unable to express their true feelings and ideals. When stressed, Fours tend to isolate themselves and brood over their negative feelings. They dwell on the darkness of their emotions and allow those feelings to engulf them. If stress increases to an extreme level, they may suddenly change and become more outgoing and anxious for human interaction. They might try too hard to please others or find ways to get closer to people. They will seem more needy, expressive, and people-pleasing. They crave affirmation and are terrified of being abandoned or rejected. They will try to help others in order to regain a sense of being needed by the ones they love.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Four:

  • Allow them to express their feelings. Don’t tell them how they feel or cut them off. Understand that their feelings are unique to them.
  • Remind them of what’s real and what they can count on. Don’t minimize their feelings, but point out the reality of the situation while empathizing with them.
  • Remind them of their talents and strengths.
  • Help them set up some positive routines that will create a more peaceful atmosphere in their home.
  • Set up healthy boundaries if they are regularly using you as an emotional dumping ground.
  • Remind them of what’s positive in the present moment.
  • Offer empathy before advice.
  • Let them know that they are lovable regardless of how different they are from others.

Read This Next: 7 Struggles of the Enneagram 4 Personality Type

Enneagram 5 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 5s:

  • Not getting enough alone time.
  • Being “barged in on.”
  • Feeling incompetent or incapable.
  • Feeling too detached from the physical world.
  • Physical malnutrition and neglect.
  • Being overwhelmed by fears and dark thoughts.
  • Not finding a niche for themselves.
  • Feeling like life is meaningless.
  • Extreme isolation and lack of connection.

Fives crave mastery in something that will set them apart from others. These types often grew up feeling misunderstood and lost in their families. They worried that they weren’t capable of handling whatever life hurled at them, and hoped that through mastery in a niche area they could feel competent. However, many Fives search endlessly for mastery and knowledge, only to get lost in theoretical analysis over real-world experience. Over time, they can become reclusive, detached, and anxious. Stress builds as they sense their growing detachment from reality and their own physical bodies. During regular stress, they try to get away from the world and narrow their focus on their niche interest. As stress builds, they become increasingly distractible. They may drink too much, binge eat, go to parties, clubs, and bars in search of an escape from their stress. They may seem especially aggressive and insensitive during these moments.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Five:

  • Help them to quiet their mind. Guide them through deep breathing and help them relax their body.
  • Help them tune into their body. Are they exhausted? Dehydrated? Hungry? In pain? Fives often detach from their physical needs under stress. Help guide them back to their bodies so that they can get physical peace.
  • Get them involved in a healthy activity. Take a walk, jump on a trampoline, go to the zoo, practice martial arts. These activities can reduce stress tremendously.
  • Remind them that you’ll be there for them regardless of whatever happens. Let them know that it’s okay to tell you about their needs and that it doesn’t make them “weak.”
  • Recognize their accomplishments and unique abilities.
  • Help them put their knowledge to the test in the real world when they’re feeling less stressed. The more they actualize their abilities the happier they will become.
  • Let them feel their grief. Show that you are trustworthy. Don’t coddle them or overly sympathize. Just show that you are there for them and remind them not to swallow their feelings. Encourage them to express themselves so that they can find relief.
  • Respect their need for privacy.
  • Don’t interrupt them or barge in on them.

Read This Next: 7 Struggles of the Enneagram Five Personality Type

Enneagram 6 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram Sixes:

  • Undependable people
  • Disorder in their environment
  • Corruption or chaos in the world
  • Not trusting themselves
  • Not having a sense of community or support
  • Getting lost in catastrophizing
  • Feeling unsafe
  • Lack of structure or clarity
  • Burnout from over-committing and taking on too many responsibilities
  • Not finding answers to their questions
  • Wishy-washy behavior
  • Having other people decide for them
  • Feeling distrustful of people close to them
  • Making mistakes

Hard-working and loyal, Sixes crave an environment of security, support, and structure. They like knowing what’s going to happen and when it’s going to happen. Natural catastrophizers, they prepare for worst-case scenarios and are vigilant to any potential disaster. Under stress, Sixes become hyper-aware of all that could go wrong. They become exceedingly anxious and envision horrific possibilities at every turn. They get lost in endless thoughts and negative possibilities and may get caught up in researching solutions or news stories that might provide answers. They may also seek an authority or guide to help them find the best way to handle the situation. If stress builds to extreme levels, they disintegrate to 3. When this happens, they become more image-conscious and focused on how they appear to others. They may put on a persona of professionalism and confidence, becoming boastful and self-promoting. Their work absorbs them and they become fixated on achievement. By being competitive and ambitious they hope they can assuage their low self-esteem and brutal anxiety.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Six:

  • Remind them of what’s real and dependable.
  • Ask them to assume the worst happens. Then what they will do? Letting them talk it out can help them to calm down and realistically assess the situation.
  • Remind them that the worst could happen, but that the best could happen as well.
  • Don’t patronize their fears.
  • Follow through on your commitments and promises.
  • Remind them that you’re there for them.
  • Help them tune into their body. Guide them through deep breathing.
  • Ask them to assess their physical needs. Are they hungry? Tired? Thirsty? Remind them not to forget their physical needs.
  • Exercise with them or go for a walk. This can increase stress-reducing endorphins in the brain.
  • Help them to calm the flurry of internal voices in their mind. Encourage them to listen to their heart and instincts.
  • Make sure they’re getting time alone.
  • Help them cancel non-essential responsibilities that are overwhelming them.

Enneagram 7 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 7s:

  • Being micro-managed
  • Not having enough personal freedom
  • Lack of free, unstructured time
  • Excessive responsibilities
  • Being cooped up for too long
  • Being stuck in one place for too long
  • Boredom
  • Doing nitty-gritty, detail work
  • Financial problems
  • Being stuck in a routine
  • Lack of loyal friendships

Sevens are enthusiastic and innovative, finding possibility in even the direst situations. Because they’re so creative it’s typically easy for them to reframe a negative situation into a positive one. That said, they still experience stress just like everyone does. When Sevens are stressed, they become more escapist and impulsive. They’ll fixate on finding a fun activity or experience to pursue, and may become more hedonistic or scattered than usual. If stress builds to extreme degrees, they can disintegrate to One. When this happens, they restrain their normally free-spirited behaviors. They will work harder, educate people, and become more critical and judgmental. They may even scold, nitpick, or become sarcastic with people – noticing all their flaws and the flaws of others.

How to Help a Stressed Enneagram Seven:

  • Help them to calm down and take deep breaths.
  • Guide them through observing their feelings, both physical and emotional. They may dislike this initially and need some time alone first. It’s important for them to do this, though, either alone or with someone they can trust.
  • Meditation can be very helpful for Sevens. Encourage them to stick with this, even if it seems boring.
  • Encourage them to accept pain as well as pleasure. Help them to realize that pain is an integral part of life and will help them grow.
  • Be supportive as they vent or try to deal with their grief.
  • Give them delicious, healthy snacks to enjoy.
  • Help them to find a song that mirrors their emotions and listen to it with them.

Enneagram 8 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 8s:

  • Feeling out of control
  • Being micro-managed
  • Having to be a follower
  • Having their autonomy infringed upon
  • Not seeing progress towards a goal
  • Failure
  • Wishy-washy, vapid people
  • Manipulative people
  • Having to sugarcoat things
  • Having to play it safe
  • Being around corruption
  • Not being challenged

Charismatic and strong-willed, Eights crave freedom and a sense of power in their world. They need independence, and any situation that takes that away from them can create an enormous amount of stress and anger. During stress, Eights become more confrontational than usual and can work harder, trying to achieve more independence and control in their lives. If stress builds to extreme degrees, Eights can suddenly become reclusive and withdrawn. They get stuck in analysis, reading, and info-gathering, trying to find subjects to master in an attempt to feel competent again. They may stop taking care of themselves physically and become more quiet and detached than usual.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Enneagram Eight:

  • Prove that you are someone they can trust. Follow through on your promises and mean what you say.
  • Give them some time to themselves to decompress and sort things out.
  • Help them to tune into their breathing and calm their body.
  • Remind them that it’s okay to let down their guard around you. Let them know this doesn’t make them “weak.”
  • Let them know if they are intimidating you.
  • Show them that progress is being made towards a goal.
  • Be clear and direct with them, but understanding.

Enneagram 9 in Stress

What Stresses Out Enneagram 9s:

  • Conflict in their environment
  • Being with people who are making a “scene”
  • Being forced into a position
  • Being ignored or passed over
  • Saying “yes” to things they don’t want to do
  • Dealing with peer pressure
  • Losing relationships that are important to them
  • Suppressing anger for too long
  • Having too many demands on their time

Nines crave inner harmony and peace. They want time to themselves to imagine, contemplate, and explore. They enjoy peaceful, harmonious environments and freedom. During stress, they try to downplay their own choices and needs in an effort to create inner peace as well as outer peace. They worry that by asserting themselves they will create more conflict, both inside and outside. They try to suppress their anger, fearing that it will fragment or destroy them in some way. If stress increases to extreme levels, Nines fixate on forming relationships and security. They worry about worst-case scenarios and become uncharacteristically pessimistic and paranoid. They might blame other people for their problems or bring up long-stifled complaints about others. Their normally serene nature cracks to reveal numerous anxieties and frustrations under the surface.

How to Help a Stressed-Out Nine:

  • Give them permission to assert themselves and their needs. Ask them to “let it all out” and remind them that this is a judgment-free zone.
  • Give them some space and time to themselves.
  • Remind them that it’s okay to say “No” to things they don’t want to do.
  • Recognize their unique talents and encourage them to pursue them.
  • Help them process their anger. Remind them that anger isn’t always a bad thing. Use examples if possible.
  • Help them tune into their bodies. What do they need physically? Help them to take deep breaths.
  • Go for a jog with them or engage in some other form of exercise. This will help them to de-stress and process some of their feelings.

What Are Your Thoughts?

Do you have any suggestions for people with your enneatype? Let us know in the comments!

Find out more about your personality type in our eBooks, Discovering You: Unlocking the Power of Personality Type,  The INFJ – Understanding the Mystic, and The INFP – Understanding the Dreamer. You can also connect with me via Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter!

Find out how each enneagram type reacts to stress and how to effectively help them. #Enneagram #Personality

Susan Storm is a certified MBTI® practitioner and Enneagram coach. She is the mom of five beautiful children and loves using her knowledge of personality type to understand them and others better! For fun, she enjoys reading fiction, spending time outdoors, or challenging her friends to tabletop board gaming competitions (Settlers of Catan, anyone?)

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4 Comments

  1. I’m an INFP, and recently tested as a 4w5 on the Enneagram Test. I’ve read descriptions about the Type Four personality and feel that it suits me more than any other as far as a fundamental enneatype is concerned. I’ve also read about how Fours integrate into Ones under growth, but Ones disintegrate into Fours under stress. After reading this article, I still feel that Type Four matches me the best, but I also related a lot to the stressors of Type One, which confuses me a little since Fours disintegrate into Twos under stress (I also identified with the stressors of Type Two, which I guess is to be expected given this relationship between Four and Two). Is it possible for a Four to experience the same stressors of the One since unhealthy Ones equate to unhealthy Fours?

    Reply

  3. I can’t remember what type I am from testing a while back, 4 or 5 maybe, but regardless, I feel stressed out by 95% of the things on every type’s list.

    Reply

  4. I am type 5w6 and the above descriptions about them are spot on, especially in feeling incompetent or incapable and being distrustful of people, especially of friends or close ones.

    Reply

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Subtypes

Posted on by DrToni

27 SUBTYPES | THE THREE INSTINCTS OF THE ENNEAGRAM TYPES

We have three basic instinctual drives that are essential for human experience, all three residing in us as necessary body-based primal forces. They are separate from personality and are behind our life strategies, often unconscious, yet powerfully directing our fundamental way of being. While these instincts are always there, one of the three becomes dominant and is more easily accessed and, therefore, more easily used than the others. When the dominant instinct merges with the core Enneagram a new character structure is formed. These are the 27 Subtypes according to the model of Claudio Naranjo.

The iEQ9 Integrative Enneagram incorporates the ‘instincts of human behaviour’ which overlay our type, merging an instinctual need with the emotional need or fear of the core Enneagram type. If one imagines the Enneagram as a plate of food, the instinct determines what you eat first or last. This relates to what we believe is good for us, or what we believe we require to get what we want and need in this world.

These instincts relate to fundamental instinctual intelligences that have developed to ensure our survival as individuals and as a human species. Recent advances in neuroscience research have confirmed the strong and often-invisible way these instincts ‘show up’ in modern society, for example, how a perceived threat to social status can trigger a primal fight-or-flight reaction.

To explore the 27 Subtypes, select an Enneagram Type below to display that Type’s 3 instinctual subtypes.

SELF PRESERVATION

 We each have a self-preservation instinct, to preserve our body, its life and effective function. This instinct, therefore, focuses us on physical safety, well-being, material security and comfort. Anxiety or stress may combine with this instinct to drive us to conserve or hoard energy and resources in response to demands from the environment or other people.

ONE-ON-ONE

 We each have a drive to project ourselves into the environment, form alliances and extend ourselves through the generations – either literally by passing on our DNA or more symbolically by passing on ideas, leaving a legacy. This instinct focuses on the intensity of experiences and one-on-one relationships, driving us to actively seek out opportunities that promise strong energetic connections with others.

SOCIAL

 We each have a social instinct to get along with others and form secure social bonds. This brings a focus on interactions and relationships with communities and groups and a high ‘social awareness’ of norms and status levels in groups. This instinct focuses energy on working towards shared purpose or the greater good.

Enneagram BASIC FEARS AND DISTORTIONS AND PATTERNS TO BE AWARE OF

Posted on by DrToni

Type 1 – Fear of being bad, corrupt, evil, or defective.

The desire to have integrity (deteriorates into critical perfection).

Value-judging, condemning yourself and others.

Type 2 – Fear of being unworthy or unloved.

The desire to be loved (deteriorates into the need to be needed).

Giving your value away to others.

Type 3 – Fear of being worthless or without inherent value.

The desire to be valuable (deteriorates into chasing after success).

Trying to be other than you authentically are.

Type 4 – Fear of being without identity or personal significance.

The desire to be oneself (deteriorates into self-indulgence).

Making negative comparisons.

Type 5 – Fear of being useless, incapable, or incompetent.

The desire to be competent (deteriorates into useless specialization).

Over interpreting your experience.

Type 6 – Fear of being without support or guidance.

The desire to be secure (deteriorates into attachment to beliefs).

Becoming dependent on something outside yourself for support.

Type 7 – Fear of being deprived or trapped in pain.

The desire to be happy (deteriorates into frenetic escapism).

Anticipating what you are going to do next.

Type 8 – Fear of being harmed or controlled by others.

The desire to protect oneself (deteriorates into constant fighting).

Trying to force or control your life.

Type 9 – Fear of loss of connection, of fragmentation.

The desire to be at peace (deteriorates into stubborn neglectfulness).

Resisting being affected by your experiences.

True Nature of Each Enneatype

Posted on by DrToni

Point 8

True Strength

Living Life as a Lionhearted Adventurer

Working on the obstacles to weakness, or to strength, through understanding our early dynamics, gives us more access to true strength, and integrates this state of Being in our present consciousness. True strength can be heat or fire in the belly or a flow of red-hot strength. We might feel strong with a sense of capacity or wholeness. It is a strength that does not fade or decrease. It can only expand and deepen, and it gives our life great vigor, aliveness, and expansiveness. That expansion can become unstoppable and endless if we continue our spiritual journey. This is the key to unlocking the knot of the Eight’s fixation. But this also gives us a strength that will be useful in our life, in our spiritual practices in general, and in dealing with the core of all types. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p38)

Point 6

Personal Will

Landing in the Grounded Support of Being

If we are a Six (or any type), personal will gives us the key to unraveling our fixation and tackling its core with more capacity. It is the appropriate tool from the invisible world, and it helps us liberate ourselves from all the distorting, crippling, and problematic patterns and traits. At the same time, we are regaining access to an important aspect of our being that will help us in living our life with confidence and steadfastness, just as it can assist us in our practices with true commitment and certainty. We can focus and stay steady in that focus. We can be mindful and not forget the mindfulness thanks to our natural steadfastness and a genuine nonconceptual commitment. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p54)

Point 2

Merging Love

Embodying the Melting Sweetness of Being

Besides unraveling the deeper knots of the type and supporting our inner practice, the experience and integration of this aspect is quite an addition to our life. As an enormous enrichment of our heart the merging love can spill over to our relationships and life in general. Our giving becomes genuine, the heart connectedness is real, and flattery and manipulation are no longer needed. In other words, the integration of the merging gold into one’s soul makes type Two more sincere and truthful, more direct and transparent in their interactions and dealings with the world. But you don’t have to be a Two to have this generous heartfulness or this way of approaching life and relationships. You simply need access to the essential quality. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p66)

Point 1

Brilliancy

Knowing the Luminous Intelligence of True Nature

By integrating brilliancy – the essence of intelligence and the true perfection – we learn about our being in a significant way, and we know presence with more depth. Brilliancy is powerful for gaining synthesizing insights from many dimensions because it brings us the capacity for synthesis that is not available to the ordinary mind. And brilliancy also provides the specific key that can unravel the shell of the One type and help penetrate its deeper core. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p78)

Point 3

Personal Essence

Maturing into Divine Humanness

Looking at our capacity to be personal, our capacity for contact and relating in a real way, and at our functionality, we become open to the arising of the true person that we are. A real person is a human being, free from the mind, the demands of time, and the influence of culture and family – a truly autonomous individual, in the world but not of it. This truth is what feeds the soul as it grows and matures. This maturation becomes an essential individuation, culminating in the station of the pearl beyond price, the royalty of the inner realm. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p92-93)

Point 4

Essential Identity

Knowing You are the Luminous, True Self

The essential identity is a particular sense of presence and nowness. It is both an identity and a timeless sense of being or presence. At the same time, as we realize and integrate this essential identity, we become free from the patterns of the Four type, and we realize the qualities and characteristics behind the idealization. We are authentic, special in an ordinary way that does not require the limelight or applause, deep and profound without having to announce it to others or create dramas around it. We are original by simply being ourselves, and our creativity tends to be naturally and spontaneously original, without us having to seek out originality. We are complete, and our expressions are true and authentic. We live simply in freedom that does not seek recognition. This is the true inner freedom. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p106)

Point 7

Pleasure Vehicle

Revealing the Bliss of Inner Truth

The more we are loyal to the inner truth, regardless of what it is, the closer we are to the Markabah. It is the turn inward, the loyalty to the path of inner truth that can become the shortest route to this multi-faceted vehicle of delight and pleasure. For it is the turning inward toward the truth that reveals itself as the soul’s greatest pleasure – coming home to itself. This discovery can be so deep it can lead to realization and some degree of liberation. This is true for all types, but the vehicle of essential pleasure is particular to the Seven type, and so it is most important for them to examine where their true loyalties and priorities lie. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p121)

Point 9

Boundless Love

Discovering the Goodness, Richness, and Holding of the Spiritual Universe

By experiencing and integrating [Boundless Love] and by recognizing it is a quality of their nature, Nines may see their patterns begin to reveal themselves as historical distortions and impressions. If Nines – or any of us – are lucky or prepared enough to experience divine love itself, then it becomes a nondual awakening to reality, where we experience the unity of being as love and goodness. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p134)

Point 5

Diamond Guidance

Liberating the Soul Through Essential Intellect

Through awakening the essential intellect, Fives are liberated from the limited mental perspective that dominates the shell and this open-mindedness and direct knowing is vital to help penetrate the core of their fixation. But all types will benefit from access to the Diamond Guidance – synthesizing what is known and penetrating what is unknown as it provides understanding and insight for the soul’s journey toward liberation. (Adapted from Keys to the Enneagram, p149)

A Guide to Enneagram Wings: What Are They All About?

Posted on by DrToni
27 OCTOBER 2019 / BY LILY YUANClinically Reviewed by Steven Melendy, PsyD. on October 27, 2019

Wings: great when served deep-fried, paired with a tear-jerking ballad, or extended upon an intricate personality model to uncover your ego’s conscience (hint: what you’re about to learn). In short, Enneagram wings are important extensions of your core Enneagram type, which provide more detail about your own unique, colorful personality.

For example, an individual who receives the following results after taking our (free!) Enneagram test would have a complete Enneagram type of 6w7, as Type Six is their most pronounced core type, with the Seven as the stronger neighboring wing (instead of the Five).

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(Pictured above: An example of a 6w7’s results)

Let’s jump right in and take a closer look at how wings work within the Enneagram personality model, with plenty of examples.

How Enneagram Wings Work

Enneagram types take off (pun intended) with influences from an adjacent type. For example, a Type Two (The Giver) could take the wing of the Type One (The Perfectionist) or Type Three (The Achiever). Some people have influences from both possible wings—however, there’s usually a stronger (i.e., dominant) wing.

Your dominant wing finds its way into your Enneagram type and acts as a sidekick to all of your inner motivations and goals. Although wings are commonly referred to as ‘extensions’ or ‘helpers’, they hold great power to unlock the potential of your multifaceted personality. And that’s where the exciting part comes in—the ability to recognize your patterns and change them!

As for notation, Enneagram wings are officially referenced (in addition to your main Enneagram type) as ‘[Core Enneagram Type Number]w[Wing Number]’. For example, “5w6” reads aloud as “Five Wing Six”. In this case, the core Enneagram type is Five, and the respective supporting wing is Six.

The Importance of Understanding Enneagram Wings

How much do Enneagram wings matter in comparison to your core type? Before moving on to wings, it’s essential to understand the key ego fixations, motives, vices, and virtues of each Enneagram core type.

By understanding wings, you can gain a clearer picture of what your inner motivations look like and how they emerge from your actions and thoughts. You’ll also be able to figure out which career paths align well with your interests and talents. On top of achieving your long-term career goals, you’ll also be able to explore potential lifestyles and environments in which you’d thrive in.

Although each of the nine Enneagram types can be influenced by both possible wings, there’s often a stronger one. It’s excessively rare — if not impossible — to have equally balanced wings. However, it’s not especially comm. It’s just as difficult to find a perfectly balanced ambivert who scores precisely 50/50 on the Introversion–Extraversion scale.

Differences Between Core Type and Wings

Can your Enneagram core type exist without its wings?

Wings can be thought of as on a continuum, in line with your core Enneagram type. They’re attached to your core Enneagram type, which we discuss in more detail below:

Your core Enneagram type (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, or 9) sets the framework for your behaviors and thought patterns. Your wing, on the other hand, branches out from your Enneagram roots and gives it a spinoff. It’s similar to having a coffee with a vanilla or espresso shot—which makes it all the more interesting!

Examples of Wings and Behavior

Wings can significantly alter how behavior manifests in an individual. For example, a 3w2 would focus on getting ahead, aiming to acquire a fanbase or support network (the Two wing influence). The 3w4, in comparison, would primarily aim for originality and self-expression in their achievements.

The same core type that sports different wings results in different preferences under the same situation. For example, a 7w6 may opt for a career in stand-up comedy to combat their inner fears and anxieties with the Six wing. A 7w8, on the other hand, could gravitate towards travel blogging and exploring the world while maintaining a large amount of creative freedom.

You may have challenges distinguishing between two Enneagram types (with wings), in which the core Enneagram type and wing number is flipped, such as the 5w6 and the 6w5. It becomes more of a challenge if both numbers fall under the same triad (the Head triad, in this case). The 5w6 would place more value in their intellectual pursuits, whereas the 6w5 focuses on trying to eliminate their anxieties.

Brief Descriptions of the 18 Enneagram Types With Wings

What does each Enneagram type look like, with wings? Find your personal description in a nutshell:

1w9: Practical and meticulous perfectionists with a knack for catching inconsistencies in others’ reasoning and judgment.

1w2: Socially aware activists and advocates who work tirelessly behind the scenes to uphold high safety standards for others.

2w1: Deeply empathetic and caring individuals who find fulfillment in others’ happiness and well-being.

2w3: Outgoing and productive organizers who thrive on connecting people together and being part of a group.

3w2: Socially-savvy and popular go-getters who enjoy meeting new people and networking events.

3w4: Driven and organized ‘boss’ always on the go with new business ideas and projects — who finds great joy in efficiency and rewards.

4w3: Charismatic and individualistic artist with a sense of wonder about the underlying beauty in nature, as well as the spectrum of human emotions.

4w5: Intense and artistic creator on a mission to use self-expression to highlight the universality of the human condition.

5w4: Idiosyncratic (and often autodidactic) lone ranger who deeply values autonomy and mastery in a subject.

5w6: Detached and curious researcher who gains energy from digging into fascinating topics, under the radar.

6w5: Resourceful and dutiful team worker who highly values security and knowledge, often with a great sense of humor.

6w7: Optimistic and fun-loving explorers of life with a (somewhat contradictory) need for safety and comfort.

7w6: Happy-go-lucky and humorous experience junkie who is always on the search for new projects to undertake.

7w8: Creative and innovative entrepreneur who enjoys experimenting and creating with new mediums and ideas.

8w7: Headstrong and confident self-starter who works hard and plays hard—paired with a fearless attitude.

8w9: Servant leader who keeps others’ best interests in mind to preserve harmony and gently encourages them to take action.

9w8: Independent yet calm vagabond on a (rather quiet) mission to discover what makes society a kinder and more accepting place.

9w1: Collected and pragmatic saver who values cooperation and justice, along with the feeling of being connected to others in their community.

When instinctual variants (six different stackings) are taken into account, this leads to 108 (18 Enneagram types with wings x 6 instinctual stackings) possible combinations.

It’s anything but cut-and-dry — and only covers the basic gist of the Enneagram basics. There are numerous extensions of the Enneagram, such as alternative triads, instinctual variants (as mentioned above), and many more. Ready for take-off?

In Summary: The Takeaway

  • Each Enneagram type has two adjacent wings

  • One of the adjacent wings is more dominant than the other

  • Wings can be thought to be on a continuum rather than a fixed label

  • Your behavior and personality are influenced by wings

  • There are 18 Enneagram descriptions with core type and wings

Are you familiar with the Enneagram wing system? How do you differ from a person with the same core Enneagram type as you, but taking the alternative wing? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

Lily Yuan

Lily Yuan is a personality psychology writer who tests as INTP and constantly questions her type. Learn more at www.lily-yuan.com. Explore her blog at www.personality-psychology.com.

About the Clinical Reviewer

Steven Melendy, PsyD., is a Clinical Psychologist who received his doctorate from The Wright Institute in Berkeley, California. He specializes in using evidence-based approaches in his work with individuals and groups. Steve has worked with diverse populations and in variety of a settings, from community clinics to SF General Hospital. He believes strongly in the importance of self-care, good friendships, and humor whenever possible.